Character: Col. Jade Curtiss
Series: Tales of the Abyss
Job: Substitute Conscience/Camp Enabler
Character Age: 35
Canon: Jade Curtiss, often known as "Jade the Necromancer", is an international man of mystery. While
he ranks only as Colonel, he's known as Emperor Peony's right hand man and trusted friend, and not without just
cause! Besides being the Emperor's childhood friend, Jade is also a genius user of 'fonic artes' (the game's magic),
among other quite notable accomplishments such as creating entire schools of science.
Jade is quite good at getting what he wants, and when asking won't suffice, manipulation or outright lying are always
acceptable alternatives. Which isn't to imply that Jade hides who he is; he's firm and vocal in his belief that he is
a cold person with little time for educating others, and as such tends to delegate annoying tasks. This is a trait he
never really loses even after admitting that serious disasters could have been avoided if only he had explained things
more thoroughly. Basically, he's a know-it-all who hates expositioning. He much prefers to be as a cheerfully enigmatic
as possible, and is content with going with the flow while complaining about his old age hampering him, despite it being
quite obvious that he's still one of the most fearsome men alive.
He also has a Pac-Man belt.
Are you sure this is the place? Well, then, it isn't much, but I'll have to make the best of it. Greetings,
I'm Colonel Jade Curtiss of the Malkuth Empire, and I'm here to spread amongst you one of my greatest attributes:
my wisdom! I've been told there is a surplus of campers here who have a warped or distinct lack of, well,
conscience. Good is Bad and Bad is Good, and so on. While I am normally not one to judge others, perhaps
cruelty for cruelty's sake is a bit much, do you agree? If you don't, then I'm sure we'll get to know each
other very well as you see, I will be the theoretical devil and angel sitting on your shoulder.
No, you heard me correctly. Even a genius such as I can't replicate something as corporeal as a conscience,
so you'll have to make due with the genuine article. If you have issues with anything, feel free to consult
me and I will steer you in the right direction with sage advice that I've acquired in my many years. In the
worst case scenario, I've been told that there is a system in place to resurrect you, is this right? Fascinating.
I've been told you put this system under quite a bit of stress due to your firm lack of sense and seeming love
of genocide, in some cases. If you're taking notes already, genocide is generally frowned upon. Certainly
not the path of action you want to go down to impress someone. No, I'm sure they'd be impressed, but hardly
in the way you wished.
You may be wondering how I'll assist you in a day-to-day manner. It's quite simple really, I'll recite some
useful advice, and let you make an informed decision. Let's run through a few example situations where my
advice would be useful... for practice, of course. Maybe you're worried about serving a cake after having
mysteriously lost a ring while baking? Well, 'all things must pass', so don't worry about it. If you're
not worried, I do recommend that you please inform all people you're serving the cake of your missing jewelry,
I suspect one of them will find it. They might even find it to their tastes. Another one? Well then, perhaps
you are threatened by an Italian plumber pair, and all you have to defend yourself is farming equipment? Well,
'bros before hoes' as they say, perhaps self-defense is the best bet. I imagine you might be suspicious of
bias on my part, but I guarantee you that I couldn't care less which way you decide.
Well then, I do believe that takes care of introductions. For those who weren't present, feel free to tell them
of my services as I certainly won't be advertising them. It's quite a hassle as it is, honestly.
By the way, do you know how long it takes for the moogles to revive someone? I'm quite curious on how much time
I'd have for an autopsy. You can never be too prepared, at my age.
96% in, w-what.